Forgiveness…
Forgiveness is hard. Well, let me not speak for everyone else…Forgiveness is hard for ME. lol There, that even FELT better.. the key to forgiveness is first learning to forgive yourself. It always starts and ends with you. You have to make a decision to forgive. I have the most forgiveness for myself because I’ve sinned against God a great deal. There were mistakes that I’ve made in my life that took me a long time to forgive myself for making. But when I finally came to that point, I was able to not only forgive myself but others also. Don’t be so hard on yourself. It’s real easy to beat yourself up for certain things, but that’s not how God sees you. God loves you and wants the very best for your life and that love comes from within. That love comes from brokenness, that love comes from shame and guilt and not feeling like enough and then finally coming to a point where you’ve finally had enough but you couldn’t get past the fact that you made some mistakes or experienced some traumatic experiences and you start acting out of character. It’s forgiveness that will pull you through. It is the love of yourself that will make you strong. The Bible says that “Greater is he that is IN YOU, than he that is in the world” (1 John 4:4) and if you have that peer living inside of you that is the epitome of love because the Bible says that “GOD IS LOVE.” (1 John 4:8)
So I encourage you to live in that Love today. Love in the love of yourself today how God loves you. How he doesn’t hold those things that you have done to yourself or to others or both for that matter, against you. Forgive yourself today and that will, in turn, help you to forgive others. Take the courage to find someone who has done you some kind of wrong in your eyes and forgive them. DO NOT HOLD ON TO THAT ENERGY. Although sometimes that is easier said than done, it is important that you work on it little by little each day to sort through the hurt and the pain and the scars and write them down and feel that negative emotion running through your body as your mind take a trip back to all of the times you were hurt and once you embrace the truth and be honest with yourself, only then you will receive a power unlike never before because of the weight that will be life red off of your shoulders. It’s ok to be angry. It’s ok to be upset. It’s ok to express your feelings, but you have to have the awareness of when you are getting closer to healing than resentment. When you can go from anger, to disappointment maybe…then make your way up from disappointment up to hurt, and so on and so forth until you get to happiness that you desire.
So:
Forgive yourself
Be kind to yourself
Don’t Hold grudges
Write it out
Heal at your own pace
I want to talk a little bit about Healing at your own pace for a second. Everybody handles pain differently. I’ve been in relationships where after it was over, I was still checking to see how fast they would move on after me and then I started to compare it to myself and it made me even more upset because, let me just keep it real, it sucks when you go through a breakup and the other person moves on quicker than you and already is in another situation and you’re just sitting there like “wtf am I doing with my life and why is it taking ME so long to recover??” It’s really hard when you get to that kind of point in your healing process. That’s another thing that you can do that is counter productive to your healing process and finally getting to a point to where you forgive yourself and not be so hard in yourself. Know that it’s ok to heal at your own speed. When my mother got divorced in her first marriage, she said it took her six years to fully heal from that relationship. It’s definitely taken me a year or two just to shake the resentment off of me. It’s going to take time. You just have to know for yourself that you are good enough no matter what and speak positive things to yourself.
Spend enough time with you to get to know yourself and then you will begin to attract people into your life that is in the same vibration as you are, better things, better relationships, better life experiences. But you cannot get to that point without forgiveing yourself first and then going out and forgiving others. Forgive those that have done wrong to you. Forgive your brother or your sister. Forgive your parents if they’ve done anything to hurt you. Make right with the people you love, if it’s that important to you. Work hard to mend those broken relationships and friendships. Don’t be afraid to ask for forgiveness, either! Make right with people. No, you are no going to be friends and “buddy buddy” with everybody. But the ones that mean the most to you, you should make a great effort to start rebuilding those relationships again. If In fact it does bring you happiness. Allow time to heal you. Allow forgiveness to make your burden lighter. Lift that heavy burden off of your shoulders and if they resist you, then you cannot take that personal either.
Have so much love for yourself that you will not feel away if someone rejects your apology. especially, coming from the right place, which is a pure and sincere heart. I have had many people that I have asked for forgiveness and get no response from. I would be doing myself and all the time I’ve spent healing to take that personal and ruin the work.
take time to write out a list of people on your life you need to forgive as well as a list of people you need to ask for forgiveness. Remember that it starts and ends with you and the quicker you are able to get to a forgiving spirit, the more you will have fun spending time on the things you love because you are not occupying your mind with hurtful thoughts that do nothing but take up unnecessary time in your life and helping hinder you from being the best version of yourself! Until next time, Much Love. ❤️
-Jermy
